I have a friend. He is a veteran golf writer, master of the English language and one of life’s fiercest critics when it comes to all things clichés. Not surprisingly this makes for dangerous ground since he not only frequents Golfmadchick.com, but as regular readers will know, this is a blog positively riddled with these vulgar, over-used, meaningless fillers.

According to him I am forbidden from using the words: picturesque, shrouded, idyllic, must see, etc. But since I have itchy feet and this blog is going somewhat off the beaten track, my January short sunshine break can only be described as, wait for it … a hidden gem!

Which brings me neatly on to my recent travels from the high-pitched frenzy of London-town to the sprawling mass of Morocco and ultimately to the haggle-free seductive calms of golf courses in Marrakech.

Armed with my ridiculously spontaneous BFF Corky, we did NOT spend any dirhams at the souks, purchase new threads, step into a Sultan’s palace, zip-wire from one cliff point to another, quad bike across the desert, marvel at snake charmers or fortunately, partake in belly dancing.

No, instead we spent all of our days thrashing our way around outrageously delicious golf courses competing for the prestigious ‘Bar-Cork’ trophy followed by the intoxicating all-inclusive experience that was our digs at the highly salubrious Kenzi Menara Palace.

Marrakech’s accessibility is arguably one of its most intriguing selling points. Just three hours from London’s Gatwick Airport, the vibrant ‘Red City’ is located at the foothills of the snow-capped majestic Atlas Mountains and [Ed’s note: allegedly] boasts 300 days of sunshine. Something that wasn’t glaringly evident during our stay, but I am assured the ‘weather-bomb’ was somehow to blame for the floundering temperatures.

That said Marrakech is undoubtedly one of the most exciting, rapidly emerging, must-visit destinations for golfers.

ASSOUFID GOLF CLUB

Who knew that nestled amidst the thorn-infested indigenous flora of North Africa lies the oasis that is the eco-friendly Assoufid Golf Club. Having played this game since the age of twelve, on many courses in many countries, it lifts the spirits knowing that when you discover a new course it can only be described quite simply as OMG, WTF or WOW – in no particular order. In just four months since its official opening this magnificent course has been awarded “Best New Course in Africa 2014” – and richly deserved too.

Would I play it again?
You betcha! That’s what credit cards are made for.
What went wrong?
Their credit card machine in the bar packed up.

AL-MAADEN GOLF COURSE 

A touch of the Scottish links designed by distinguished golf architect Kyle Phillips, one of the most characteristic features of the Al-Maaden Golf Course are the geometrical mirrored lakes that reflect the rays of the sun and the beauty of the Moroccan gardens.

Would I play it again?
Definitely! A perfect post-flight round to kick start the holiday.
What went wrong?
We spent over £60 on G&Ts in this super impressive clubhouse bar despite staying at an all-inclusive resort.

SAMANAH GOLF COURSE

Five little words: a beast of a course! Samanah Golf Course must be the only course I know which brings you out in a cold sweat and tears to the eyes as you step up to a putt. The comically intimidating greens and exaggerated undulations will either make or break your game. Either way, it makes that long-awaiting G&T in the clubhouse afterwards all the more palatable.

Would I play it again?
Absolutely, but I would drink the G&Ts before teeing off – in preparation.
What went wrong?
The bar ran out of Gin!

AND THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED NEXT … 

NOTE FROM THE ED:
Final word must go to yourgolftravel.com – who arranged our last-minute “we want good golf – lots of sunshine – no culture – all inclusive break.” Fantastic value, enormously good fun and highly recommended.

MARRAKECH GOLF REVIEW: